When I was a child one of my favorite moments of the day was being tucked into bed. Mom or Dad would tuck the covers around us, pray with us, tell us they loved us and kiss us goodnight. My siblings and I had a preference for whom to tuck us into bed. My father was sincere, well-meaning and kind, but he just didn’t have that tender touch that mother did. No offence, Dad, but you just didn’t have it!

Mothers are important for a lot of reasons, but not least among them is the side of God they show us. The images of God as nurturing and mother-like are many: One of the lesser-known ones comes up in today’s Gospel lesson. The word translated “Counselor” (paracletos) is a complex one in Greek, encompassing many meanings lost in any one English word: “counselor,” “comforter” “helper,” “exhorter,” “encourager.” These are aspects of parenting many of us experienced with our mothers. While any one or all of these words could apply to a paternal parent, for many Christians their mother’s touch was the first icon of this nurturing side of God. It is not without basis, then, that they find the work of the Holy Spirit associated in their minds with the divine mothering principle. That is where they first learned tenderness.

It needs be noted here that Jesus says He will send “another” counselor. The first Counselor is Jesus Himself, as in I John 2:1, “If any man sin we have an ‘advocate’ with the Father, Jesus Christ, the Righteous,” The word is “paracletos.” In other words, what the Spirit does for us is not foreign to what Jesus Himself does for us. As the Spirit is “mothering,” so Jesus can also be “mothering.”

Indeed, there is a tender nurturing quality to what Jesus says to the disciples today:

“Peace I leave with you.” A crying child come to Mommy with a bloody knee, his world is upset by the fall, and the sting on his skin is intolerable—until Mommy tenderly washes it and treats it and puts a Spidey-man band-aid on it and kisses it! Now the child has the peace the mother has left with him. Such is the peace Jesus leaves with us: The world skins us and bruises us, sometimes it takes a horrendous toll. But the Spirit gives us the peace Jesus had during His Passion so we can endure. Indeed, that very peace is what the world needs so badly and just cannot create—highlighting its need for God. Thanks to mothers who taught us what that was.

“Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” The world of the man is flint against steel, the abuse we dish out on one another is a voluntary adversity that draws out the best in us. Only men can do that for each other, and we do it with pride and respect. But truly sad is the boy who does not also know that when the abuse gets to be just too much he has another recourse, a haven of comfort and tenderness, the arms of his mother. In the same way, living the Christian life in this world will always demand the best of us, buffeting us and trying us until we are polished gold in the hands of the Master Jeweler. And through it all, standing beyond and behind like a great rock in the midst of the stream, Jesus reminds us that when it gets to be too much we have a haven, a place where there is a peace that does not depend on the opinions of others or the threats of the surroundings, but on the eternal rest of God. Thanks to mothers who taught us what that was!

Jesus also said, “If a man loves Me he will keep My word.” My mother, in disciplining us kids, would often say, “This hurts me more than it hurts you.” Of course I did not understand them, but now I understand that obedience was not merely about conformity, but about relationship. When I did what my mother asked me to do there was harmony in the household. My siblings and I had more time to play together. Mother and Father were proud of us and took great joy in what we did. So Jesus follows these words with: “And My Father will love him and we will come and make our home with him.” When we follow Jesus we show that we love Him, and we have harmony with others who also follow Him, and with God Himself. Thank you, mothers, for teaching us that!

Then there is one more thing: Jesus tells them He is going away, and He expects them to be happy for Him. Then He says, “Now I have told you before it takes place, so that when it does take place, you may believe.” The first day of school always fills Mommy with a sweet sadness. She knows that her little one is taking steps that will eventually take him or her out of the house, into their own home, and into their own lives. Moments with them will become precious and few and it breaks her heart. But at the same time she is proud. She would suffer anything to help her little one grow up well. She will be proud of him when he leaves, even as it breaks her heart—she wouldn’t have it any other way! All she does is for the benefit of her little ones. And so Jesus sets up the disciples for their own maturing: I am going away, and this is reason for joy for you. I tell you this now so that when it happens you will understand, and believe, and grow and flourish in the life God has made you for! All Jesus does is for the benefit of us, His children. Thank you, mothers, for teaching us that!

This is the first generation in recorded history when we have the resources necessary to end extreme poverty in the earth by the end of the millennium. The United Nations has issued 8 Millennium Development Goals. #3 is to promote gender equality and empower women. Why is this so strategic? Because when a man receives assistance he uses it to better himself, and then by extension those for whom he cares. There is nothing wrong with this approach, but people in poverty are often the least equipped to maximize the potential on that level, and failures are quite frequent. It is a high stakes way of going about things, something to which we men are naturally attuned. On the other hand, when a mother receives assistance she uses it for the wellbeing of her children. It is a lower-stakes approach, more cautious and longer-term, but statistically it is far more likely to actually improve the lot of the next generation. Jesus took the long-term approach. He poured His life and ministry into 11 men. Those 11 men learned from Him, received upon themselves the Spirit of Jesus, and took His message into the world. And the Comforter, the Counselor, has been mothering people into relationship with God and one another ever since.

Fr. Paul Moore+